I’m middle aged, and I’m still haunted by my childhood. I have self esteem issues. I endlessly second guess myself; I endlessly rehash things trying to get the ending to come out differently.

My mother is crazy. Not charmingly eccentric, but mean and crazy. Is that fair? After all, there are a lot of people with mental issues who aren’t mean- I know that. My mother has mental issues, and she is mean. Lately, I’ve started thinking about her as someone who is perpetually 13 years old. I think that’s apt. My mother, even though she occupies the body of an 84 year old woman, is a resentful 13 year old girl.